ROUGH AND TUMBLR: BOOKPORN, IT’S LIKE WE NEVER HAVE MET…

When the conversation happens, the one you hope never will, are you ever really prepared?  I mean, how could you be?  Of course a favorite Tumblr blog can, at any point and without so much as a warning, decide that you are now contributor non-grata and abruptly stop posting your “art.”  You have become spam in their inbox, and there really is nothing you can do about it, except accept, as you humbly–and bravely–traverse those intractable well-worn stages of grief: Drinking, Sulking, Spouse Blaming, Pyromania, and finally–and thankfully– blessed and unapologetic…Narcissism.

My ‘The conversation‘ went something like this:

Bookporn:  Hey nhornby (my Tumblr handle), you sent your submission like 30 times, please be careful.  I’m posting this because there’s no way to send you a message.                                    UPDATE:  another 20 times. Wow. Stop.

nhornby:  I suppose I am in dire need of attention:) Kidding…my computer froze last night—must have sent those with the restart—but, hey, seems to have provided a bit of comic relief…for some…and a headache for others…will you still post? Just askin’…:)

Bookporn:  I’m still thinking about it 😛

nhornby:  OK, but it is just not fair to take this mishap out on poor Walt Whitman; I mean he endured enough controversy in his lifetime. Let’s be fair to him…and honor him…on this holiday (Valentine’s Day) dedicated to all things sex…I mean love…and, of course, poetry…

AND you did, Bookporn, allow Walt Whitman to sing his bard-ish body electric on the pages of your bookish body-ish Tumblr blog…AND nhornby appreciated this gesture–this charitable triumph of free verse over a pronounced and barely disguised disgust for ineptness…and nhornby was happy…and all was good…on Valentine’s day…that chocolate heart-ish  Hallmark-ish specious-ish holiday…(though, as an aside, nhornby’s “singing” of her own “body electric” was/is/has been/continues to be seriously curtailed by societal conventions of what constitutes love and sex and– apparently–matrimony, but that, dear reader, is, as they say, another story…)

wwscroll1

THANK YOU, BOOKPORN!

whitmanscroll1BUT…JUST WHEN THINGS SEEM THE MOST COPACETIC… when one finally exhales and dares to relax with one’s nightly fifth of bourbon which one cleverly keeps hidden under the sink in the guest bathroom so that she, I mean one, can blame the existence of said bourbon, if found, on some friend or another (or even the grandfatherly washing machine repair guy) who has recently visited one’s home…THINGS FALL APART; THE CENTRE CANNOT HOLD (as William Butler Yeats so presciently wrote in The Second Coming…hmmmmm….)

Each new post-Whitman-debacle photo collage nhornby submitted to Bookporn was responded to with a radio silence so pronounced, it was like….a radio silence (thank you, Gertrude Stein)…

The countless creative hours that nhornby had spent in compulsively compiling and arranging theme collages of books with items which–to the outside non-OCD world at least–exhibited only a tenuous connection to each other, could not be reclaimed…

Prior to the Whitman submission, nhornby had been granted, in her own mind at least, something akin to celebrity status, as each creative montage she offered had been published within 24 hours, if not sooner…

So, when Pi day came and went with nhornby’s homage to that historic, epic, and somewhat irrational day in March completely ignored, the irrefutable fact had to be faced:.  Tumblr’s Bookporn had unceremoniously severed ties with nhornby …perhaps forever…

and it hurt…but–thankfully–someone (perhaps a visiting friend or even the grandfatherly  washing machine repair guy) it seemed had left a mostly full fifth of bourbon under the guest bathroom sink….

What was NOT posted by Bookporn…I know, crazy…right?

JohnWaters

ACTUAL SCRATCH AND SNIFF CARD FROM JW RETROSPECTIVE IN THE 1980S

 

Absinthe

IT’S THE GREEN HOUR SOMEWHERE

 

lifewithpi

PI DAY–OF COURSE!

 

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